Thursday, March 01, 2007

Amar, approaching 2 years old


Quite some time ago, I had a 'discussion' with this special someone. I disagreed with her style of treating sibling-A differently from sibling-B. Unwisely, I said she was being unfair. In response to my comment, all she said was something like - one day in the future, you will understand and see things more clearly.

Indeed I have.

So far, I have two children - Sarah and Amar. Both are different, but special in their own way. Amar is a very quiet boy, too quiet that at 22 months (almost 2 years old) he only say one word; "Ba" or "Baba".

Recently Amar showed his talkative side by starting to babble. I welcomed his babbles although they could be so noisy like a chicken clucking.


The above used to be Amar's favourite toy. He could sit at the toy corner and push the cubes, one by one, from one end to the other. And I'm quite sure his 'air-liur' meleleh due to his very high concentration playing the game.


This is another obsession. The pink beetle was actually a birthday present for Sarah from Auntie De and family. Amar has just found out that if he pushed the car key into the keyhole, the boot will flung open. Everyday, he will have a full session playing with the car - opening and closing the boot.

One thing, he doesn't share his toys. When you see Amar gets upset, you'll know it's either he is hurt or Sarah is trying to "play together" with him.

Amar is a reasonable boy. I remember having problem to have a five minute peace from Sarah. When she was little, she tagged along wherever I go. Unlike Amar, he is easily pleased. Give him toys or let him watch a DVD - then he will stay put for hours.


Precisely opposite from Sarah, it was difficult to "introduce" books to Amar. Sarah has a memory like an elephant. She remembers well and it is always easy to teach her things. Amar is a different story. Whenever I sat him on my laps and start opening a book, he will find a way to wriggle himself free. He is just not interested -full stop-

Well, of late - Sarah and I have managed to excite Amar into reading! The only book that has an effect on Amar was; "Aaaarrgghh, SPIDERS!" by genius Lydia Monks. (Sadly, the book has to be returned to the library a few days ago)


The same with writing or scribbling. Lots of friends made a huge fuss when I was slow to act to a very young Sarah holding a pen. I was not worried as she really has very good control when holding a pen and she even knew to scribble only on paper.

Amar picked up a pen very late - I was always worried that he was not interested in books or writing. But last December (at the age of 20 months) he picked up MY pen and scribbled NON STOP on MY sudoku book. Sarah knew she must not touch my sudoku book. She must not scribble on my book. But when Amar held the pen for the first time, I let him scribbled my Sudoku book. I was too happy that he finally showed some interest!

I was too happy I recorded the important milestone on my camera-phone. Unfortunately, I still have problem to upload it to Windows Movie Maker.

My current weakness is I compare Amar's development with Sarah. The health visitor who came to visit us recently said I shouldn't. Back to the story between the special someone and I, now I have learnt that every child is different. They grow at different pace and it's up to us to give them the support they need.

I have also learnt that we are not treating our children differently intentionally. But because they are different, the approach is different too. The best thing to do now is to take it easy and celebrate every achievements accomplished by them.


Oh yes, that special someone is my mother.

31 comments:

k.d said...

Every child is different. Definitely. Just like you and your siblings. And from what I see boys are definitely harder to teach. They need your full attention.

D said...

Yes, it is true. We should be fair but we can never treat each child the same. My twins, for instance, have different personalities. What's most important is, they understand that different does not mean the amount of love is different. We learn through experience, right?

juwaidah said...

yup.. so true.. so true...

Kak Elle said...

mamasarah through experience with my niephews and nieces I find that girls advance faster than boys...and from this one of my sis use them as her subject when she took the course of montesorri(excuse of spelling)1 yr older spelling pun dah lupa ek..hehe

Ajzie said...

Nisak..kita macam ada sense yg serupa pula.. Saya juga sudah buat N3 pasal Ammar saya 3hari yg lepas dan masih save as draf..

Memang betul setiap anak berbeza-beza, begitu juga Ammar saya dan little princess saya Alya.

Anonymous said...

how i wish my Iman is as calm and charming as Amar!!..keligatan Iman sometimes merisaukan juga!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Kak Nisak...same goes to me eikk.... Aiman & Anas are different. Aiman alwiz tantrum n Anas such a cool boy. hi hi hi.. but I love both.. VERY VERY MUCH


Lela

Mummy Rizq said...

Me with one kid, blom tau macam mana. He's 2 years 4 months now and begins to talk a lot.. i mean A LOT! Everyday, coming back from work, I am so eager to know what new word he has learn. An to my surprise he learnt a lot of indonesian words! Haa.. haa...

Anonymous said...

nice and interesting. every person is unique.

zino said...

setiap seorang anak ni memang berbeza.. dan kita kena peka kepada perbezaan tersebut.. ada yg late starter.. ada yg cepat belajar dan sebagainya..

dengan perhatian dan sokongan kita..inshaAllah mereka semua boleh berjaya..

Anonymous said...

i STILL disagree with my mum with regard to the different ways she treats us 3 siblings hee hee. maybe because i only have nuha for now. i'm sure in future i will see it differently :D

Anonymous said...

but it's hard not compare him with sarah right - as a baseline....
ashley also has good control on pens and only scribbles on papers (thank GOD!)

dith said...

Nisak: this is the third time I am commenting here...ponat den...apa kena lah menda alah nih.

Anyway...sigh..I was saying that even though Amar is slow in reading and writing, at least he has a strong concentration ability which is valuable for child development. I have a strong inkling that he will one day become a great thinker, insyallah.

Btw, re my previous comment, I am sure Mynn meant well and I am sure he had imparted good advice.

Muhammad is back safe but sound I am not sure, hehe.And Mynn must have given him a fotune coz the customs check point at Ampang (read: my mom) told me that he bought a number of things which we didnt ask. In fact we didnt give him money to shop only for the trip and accomodation. Thanks again to both of you!

Anonymous said...

Mums knows best!

oldtown~Smell the Roses said...

Well, i need to wait for my second baby. Hihi..
anyway..Nani suggest mamasarah belikan buku yg Ammar suka tu kat bookstore. mesti dia suka. akhirnya bukutu jadi milik dia gak!And maybe after that, blh train plak buku cite lain.hihi..

ifos said...

this is just like what my father had said a while ago... hehe.

When is Amar's birthday, anyway?

Anonymous said...

dith
it was a JOKE lah dith! and ikelah started it (sorry ikelah, blaming you).

silversarina said...

each child is different , a girl usually acquires writing/reading skills so much faster than a boy but that doesn't mean a boy is a slow-learner. Just give him full support and always refrain yourself from comparing him with anybody else ...I think he's doing just fine lah....cutenya amar :)

Arifah said...

I hope to be a good mother one day! =) You're right in saying everyone is different and special in their own way.

Anonymous said...

kenapa ek, buku spider tu yg diminatinya? hehe. Both ur kids are not only special, but amazing in their own way.

Mulan said...

ya ya.. kids are different. being 1st or 2nd, boy or girl.

Idham said...

Amar - such great concentration from a lovely young man!
Only now I curi a little time to blog hopped - wow byknya cerita baru dan gambar2 baru yg i dah missed. :)

that special someone - i sharing her wisdom from her wealth of experience, afterall mamasarah must have been different from her own siblings too....how different?

idham

Unknown said...

setuju, anak2 ni memang berbeza antara satu sama lain...

maklang said...

TUNGGU BILA DIA MASUK SEKOLAH NANTI....LAGI SUSAH NAK CONTROL....some of them laa

Anonymous said...

You have been tagged.
Just for fun. ;)

http://ikelah.fotopages.com

cikdinz said...

besalah tuh, budak-budak kan.
tp beza mcm mana pon tetap anak kita.
cara pendekatan dan pengajaran mmg lah berbeza. tapi kasih sayang ibu bapa tetap sama kan....

Kiah Kardashian said...

ala boys kan kalau ikut nature mmg lambat matang dari girls. So i rasa mmg bab development girls mesti advance.

Jangan risau...setiap individu tu kan unik. :)

p/s: Wait until i get my second one. Banyak cakap pulak. Hehhehe

Jamil said...

The name Lydia Monks rings a bell. I wonder where have I heard it before?

And don't worry about Amar. Any growing boy who has an interest in cars is very much normal *wink*

p.s. Saying how parents treat their children unfairly; I suppose everyone says that at least once during their lifetime, no?

Anonymous said...

ur mom is a wise woman...

dont worry lah.. like itold u before.. hatice n baddin diaorang punya dev gab banyak berbeza (though once baddin starts to develop..he is catching hatice quite fast..)this isnormal.. let him develop at his own pace..

n definitely one rule in parenting... compare ur kids' development privately n quietly with ur spouse.. jangan bagi the kids hear.. they will get sad... n definitely loads of encouragement for the slow one... iskh.. i ni cakap mcm pandai.. heheh

Mama Sarah said...

Thank you ALL for commenting. I will take on board your views and advises. Thanks again.

Azie about the same entry tu, cerita kita kebanyakannya berkisarkan anak-anak. Mesti akan jadi kebetulan topic yang sama nanti.

ifos Amar's birthday is 3.4.05

Anonymous said...

rite on...different kids need different approaches. as parents, we shud never compare them with anyone....not even with their siblings.

hope you don't mind me link this post. :)