The Wonder Years: Trial no. 3 & 4 and the beginning

There were two previous entries regarding Sarah's trials to the nursery. I like it when The Wonder Years (the nursery) gave Sarah a couple of trial sessions so that Sarah was familiar with the new surrounding and that surely would help her being away from the family for the first time. I left Sarah for an hour during the first two trials. Both times, Sarah did not adapt herself well. So she was given more trial sessions until she's shown more confidence.

Trial no. 3: 3 April 2007 (on Amar's 2nd birthday)

It didn't go too well this time. Sarah refused to go. My words of consolation did not work. She still refused. Somehow we managed to leave the house, despite the crying and screaming of scared Sarah. Ten steps later, in between sobs she said she needed the toilet; "nak yak" was her excuse.

So we turned back and I asked her to do 'her business' quickly. She just sat down continue crying. Honestly I was angry, but I felt sorry for her at the same time. If only liking school comes naturally to her! Knowing that the Babah wouldn't be too happy if I gave in to her, I insisted that she should still attend her trial session that day.

At the nursery, Sarah screamed so loud. Tugging on my jacket and pulling my hands and legs. Flipping my skirt and yanking my bag. It was not a pretty sight. She managed to escape with the trick.

I thought she'd be better by then, but I was wrong. We headed home. Sarah was relieved (I think) but my mind was busy thinking of how to con her next time.

Trial no. 4: 5 April 2007

I'm sure there are similar children who have this sort of separation anxiety. It was not only difficult for her, but also to me. Who'd have the heart to force this fragile girl when the whole exercise is not even compulsory? Thinking that Sarah will gain better social skill with children her age and exposing her to more fun activities, I had to put a stern-front.

She cried when i got her ready to the nursery. Asking me to promise not to leave her again. This time, I stayed with her for one hour. We did some colouring together and she very much preferred it that way.

One hour later, we went home together. You should see her face lit up when she said 'goodbye' to everyone. She was the happiest when it was "go home" time.

The beginning: 10 April 2007
If you can remember, we were on a break to the South the weekend before. Both Sarah and Amar were very poorly after the holiday. On Tuesday, when she was supposed to begin her real session, she had very high temperature. She was lying down the whole day; as limp as a sotong. I know I was soft with her, but she was ill. So I called her nursery and gave our apologies. I have also managed to change her to the morning sessions.

Real session no. 1: 12 April 2007
With a nervous heart, I left a wailing Sarah behind. The strategy was to occupy my hands with Amar (so that I cannot carry her), shorten the goodbyes, letting her know that I would definitely be back for her and to wear a pair of trousers to avoid mishap like before. I wish I didn't have to leave her when she was in tears. But I had to.

Amar started to cry too. He looked traumatised by everything. I was slightly worried he'd be the same when it is his turn. Amar and I went home with Sarah's bag! At home, I made sure that the receiver of the phone was in place and my mobile should be switched on and within the receiving range.

An hour later, the home phone rang! My heart beat very fast. It was the nursery. Oh dear, what has happened to Sarah? She had a soiled nappy and the staff asked where her bag was! There I was, running as fast as I could to the nursery with her koala bear bag. I just left the bag at the reception, when I was assured by the staff that Sarah was doing well in the class.

At 11am, I rang the nursery to check if Sarah was OK? I was told that Sarah's class was playing in the garden and I shouldn't feel worried- so I was very relieved. I fetched her around 12.30pm. When I arrived, Sarah was weeping and holding Stevie's hand. Stevie said Sarah suddenly became upset when a parent came to fetch one of the children there. Otherwise she was quite happy playing in the class.

and so on...
Sarah has attended eight more sessions after that. If you think that Sarah has gotten over the crying period, you are wrong! She still cries whenever she was sent to the nursery. And she still hates the word 'school' or 'nursery'. However, there were times when she felt like talking about what she did at the nursery; painting, singing and playing in the garden. And her appetite has improved (or doubled!) after she started at the nursery.

Despite the woes and struggles every nursery mornings, I think Sarah actually likes going to nursery. It's just that she prefers to stay at home a tad more.

The Mama
I feel bad leaving an unhappy child like that. Like I said, it's not compulsory and I can home educate her like before. I was not comfortable and scared if Sarah had a rough start, she might have difficulties when she starts the real schooling in the future. Surely I don't want Sarah to have a bad scar in her mind.

Obviously, I don't want her to get into a habit of crying every morning of her nursery sessions. However I am hopeful and still praying that she will change for the better. Let's hope for more cheerful updates regarding this matter in the future, OK?